(Re) Connecting with my roots

It had been eight years, since my last visit to India. To be honest, I had lost hope, that I’d ever make it back. Yet, when my mother asked, “Mili, we are planning to go to India in December, would you like to come?” my instant answer was not, “Yes, I’d love to.” I searched for excuses not to go. I was not sure why the apprehension existed. I love to travel, and would go anywhere really. It became a chore to have to find excuse after excuse to not go. Time was running out, and the day was upon us when the booking had to be finalised. After a lot of umming and ahhing, it was decided, I’d be joining my parents on their trip to India in December 2022.

In a way, I’m glad I went. It was an emotional experience. It was closure, weirdly enough, and more than anything it was growth. It was learning to be okay, with perhaps, there being a time, in which I may not go back or perhaps, a time that when I do go back, things won’t be the same. But I needed to get on this plane, go across the world, to realise and learn that. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean this in a negative way. Not having grown up in India, for a long time as I grew older, here in New Zealand, I struggled with my identity. Am I an Indian? Or am I Western? Do I follow the traditions and culture that has been instilled in me by my parents, grandparents and extended family, in whatever shape or form? Or do I blend in with the Western culture, and follow their norms? Regardless of what I chose, I felt like I was disappointing the other. In my mind, it had to be one or the other. I, still to this day, struggle with this.

Each time I go to India, all I really want to do is visit spots with historic significance. I am in awe of the history that exists in India, and the landmarks, that you can still see to this day, built centuries ago. It doesn’t matter how many times I’ve been to the Taj Mahal, each time, I go, it feels like I’m seeing it for the first time. There is a beautiful feeling in my heart that erupts, as I lay my eyes on the structure. No other place in the world, gives me the same feeling. You go from city to city, and you see the colours, the culture, the food, the hospitality, the people, who are all so different, and unique, and leave you wanting more.

As the trip went by, the more I realised and learnt, and was proud to be a part of a heritage that has a lot of cultural significance. India is a country, that has 28 states, 22 official languages, and 9 classical dance forms. It also includes music, literature, and art. With history spanning for centuries, every street, person, place, and thing tells a story worth a thousand words.

The more I pondered over the sights, sounds, and experiences, I couldn’t help but feel proud of the country I represent. It doesn’t matter, what other people think of it, or what their opinion is, an educated (and culturally inclusive) person will always say the right thing about any destination. This trip gave me a chance to learn more, and I hope that as I grow older, I get to go on many more trips to the country, where I was born, and learn more.

Until next time,

MiliG

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(Re) Connecting with my roots

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